The First One

I am starting this blog because A. I am a Humor Writer. B. I have a lot of ideas. C. None of them are very good.

Now before I get to the first post, you may have seen some of my comedy before. For example, a feature movie called Hamlet: The Vampire Slayer. Or a blog called Bunny Droppings. Maybe even you read one of my grammatical train wreck books (not that I promise any better in this blog!) Free Advice: Just Add Money, or Porn Free Bibles. Or more then likely I know you and I told you about this blog. If you like it, please tell others. I like the attention.

Topics of this blog will cover all sorts of ideas that will not change the world and whatever else I feel like writing about.

The first idea is one I thought about over breakfast. Our cat, Marty, loves to look out of the window but will never go outside. He detests being in the outside world so much that when we put him in the back yard, he thinks of nothing more then ways to gain entry into the house. The pet door is merely another window for him to stare at. We know he understands the concept of the pet door, because the dog will barrel past him during household reentry.

For the great deal of time Marty spends staring at the outside world, I figure he should have a travel guide for cats. For example:

“The south window is an excellent place to stare at the neighborhood. Occainsionally a bird or two may swoop…”

Or

“Be sure to check out all the branches of the tree on the North Window. Smalls animals love to climb…”

and finally…

“The little table in the kitchen is excellent place to grab a bite to eat. There is a bowl that is always refilled by the curly haired man. If budget is a concern this place costs nothing. The living room sometimes produces treats but you will have to meow for those.”