Other Fun Pass Throughs

A while back, I mused about the idea of building a pass through in my bathroom in a post entitled: The Manly Bathroom. I’m honored by the sheer scale of readership for that post. For every four visits to the website, at least one of them is an unsuspecting DYI-er looking for either bathroom pass throughs or manly bathrooms. Of course my site has no helpful advice for either. However, since the public has demanded pass throughs, I shall offer more fun locations in the house for pass throughs.

The Children Bedrooms:

Most sibling rivalry is seeded in jealousy of the other sibling. The easiest way to solve disputes is a pass through in two adjacent children rooms. Rather than having Big Sister play with her My Little Ponies secretly in her room, Little Brother can stage a G.I. Joe sniper with a tranquilizer gun via the pass through. In order to get rid of pesky Little Brother, Big Sis needs to toss one of the ponies over. Little Bro can now feel like he is part of the herd and Big Sis can spend her youth free of a murder rap.

The benefits in their teenage years are clearly when Little Bro is feeling left out of the Big Sis Sleepover Party. Her friends will be thrilled to know Little Bro is watching them sleeping, making sure they are safe during the night. Big Sis will benefit from the pass through when she tosses her bag of pure black-tar heroine into Little Bro’s room during an DEA raid of the house. The parents really should think about building another pass through from the bathroom to Little Bro’s room as well to dump the Meth Lab equipment. Lucky for Little Bro, he has a very caring family and they will visit him in federal prison.

The Living Room:

Most homeowners usually build pass throughs from the kitchen to the living room. Very few think about the benefits from the living room to the outside. For the family in the previous example, they can use the quick access to outside during the DEA raid. Even for families that don’t make their income on illegal substances, the outside is a great place to spend a lazy afternoon.

The homeowner doesn’t even need to leave their home to get a dose of the great outdoors. Of course by “Great Outdoors,” I mean hunting. Imagine sitting on the couch watching Hitler invade Poland for the 467th documentary when a bird flaps by the window. BLAM! Diner is ready tonight. That pesky dog who always poops on your lawn. BLAM! The neighbor who always tries to convince you to join their church… BLAM! Those FBI agents telling you that your house is not legally Bobdonia and still accountable to the laws of the US. BLAM! BLAM! THEY WILL NEVER TAKE YOU ALIVE! What’s that tear gas can doing on your floor? That’s YOUR pass through! From YOUR country! They’ll need to show you a passport before they can swing through the opening…

The Office:

Even if your family doesn’t make their living via any illegal activity, the office is a great place for a pass through. Imagine, the President is over to visit and you have an idea that will innovate the oil spill clean up: Bob’s Giant Vaccu-suck. You casually leave the screen saver off, and make little remarks about the office pass through. Obama glances at the screen. “Brilliant,” he exclaims and hugs you for your innovation. You are a true patriot and American.

Except he is not looking. He keeps remarking on the quality of the craftsmanship. The plans are RIGHT THERE. HE WILL LOOK. Time to a take a hostage…

On second thought, maybe you should stick to just a bathroom pass through.

Published by aaronfrale

Aaron Frale has been writing comedy for years. He won "Best Writer" as co-writer for a feature film called Hamlet: The Vampire Slayer at the B-Movie Film Fest in New York. You can check out an in depth review of Hamlet from the film critic Obscurus Lupa. Various plays, sketches, and films written by Aaron have been lurking about the Albuquerque scene. In May 2010 he received a Masters of Fine Arts in Dramatic Writing from the University of New Mexico. Music is another one of his past times. His rock band, Spiral, was rated 9 out of 10 by the DPRP for their 2011 release The Capital in Ruins. He currently resides with his wife, Felicia, and a small black dog that thinks he is a giant black dog.. Check out his personal humor blog at: https://wontchangetheworld.com/ and his rock band: http://thespiral.bandcamp.com/

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