For my post this week, I want you all to spend $2 on our album. It’s not comedy but we are trying to get it to go up the charts on Amazon. So think of it as a poor writer/musician begging for spare change, and you’d give it to a homeless guy so why not a writer/musician? I could give you some bullshit about investing in someone’s dreams but in reality, you are helping my band get a number one slot on Amazon even if it’s only for one day.
“But wait a second Aaron. If I give you $2, and everyone else does won’t you get rich? Isn’t that a Ponzi scheme?”
Who are you and how did you start talking in my blog?
“I don’t know. I felt compelled to ask a question.”
But why now? Why not three years ago when I started the blog?
“I don’t know. Look, I was browsing the internet for KFC Cosplay and I really don’t want an erection to go waste so will you answer the question or not?”
Right, well. I really don’t want to know. Better answer the question at the very least to get rid of you. Yes, I’ll get rich and no it’s not a Ponzi scheme because you get music out of the deal. And if I do get rich, I’ll just write more and create more music. So if you like what I write and/or what music I create. Then you should support it.
“I lost my erection, jerk.”
This is really serious! In the olden days, the days when tights were manly-
“The Eighties?”
No, the Renaissance. Rich people used to support artists by paying them to create art, music, etc. These rich people were called patrons of the arts and with patrons, a lot of artists wouldn’t have made it.
“So when I pay hookers to dress like Colonel Sanders, I’m a patron too?”
No, that’s just sick. But you can be a patron. In fact, the internet has given us a rare opportunity to support the art, music, or writing we love and we don’t have to be rich. Give an artist you like $2 and those will add up and eventually be turned into more of what you like from that artist. People really have the power to fund music, movies, books and just about anything they love and the don’t have to spend a lot to do it.
“Do you think if a cop pulls me over and says ‘License and Registration,’ then I say ‘Sure, but I’m going to finish my coffee first,’ they would let me finish my coffee?”
Were you listening to anything I just said?
“What if it was a Venti? Like those giant ass ones and I slurped slowly?”
You know what. Never mind, just let industry decide to give you whatever it wants. Don’t come crying to me when you don’t like any of the movies, books, or music to come out. You could have been a patron.
“Dude, there is this video you have to check out!
Totally crap my pants funny!”
Thank you for proving why we need patrons.
Time Burrito 