The Tacos Are Nigh

The bible tells us that the world will end. The bible also tells us that if someone rapes our daughters, the rapist┬ácan marry them if they pay off the father. But┬álet’s ignore the fact that the bible can be wrong on some occasions and assume the world will end. One of the signs of theContinue reading “The Tacos Are Nigh”

We Need Just a Liter or Six

Last night was like a Doctor Who episode. My students were called out of the classroom to help the medical assisting students practice their blood drawing skills. Of course, my school really is a career college and not an alien plot to experiment on human test subjects… right? RIGHT? Aside from the fact that aContinue reading “We Need Just a Liter or Six”

Great Conspiracies

Since I am a purveyor of fine truths since 2010, I want to shed light on some of the more notorious cover-ups in history. What happened: In 2004, George Bush won the election against John Kerry after a voter recount. What Really Happened: Toucan Sam really won the election. What we don’t know is thatContinue reading “Great Conspiracies”

The Romulan Senate Gives You A Sad Face

I read an article about a cloaked alien ship near Mercury. The conspirator thinks that an ejection from the sun revealed the cloaked ship. The scientist says that it’s a data processing glitch. I say that it’s Jimmy Hoffa’s grandmother hooked to an MK-ULTRA device by Elvis while Kennedy’s assassins order a Mayan calender shapedContinue reading “The Romulan Senate Gives You A Sad Face”

Why We Are Not Allowed to Leave Earth

From the Bunny Droppings Files: I recently discovered that there is a version of the Harry Potter books in ancient Greek. I think this is further proof of an alien conspiracy. Allow me to elaborate. There are only two groups of humans that use ancient Greek in their day to day lives, beer guzzling fratContinue reading “Why We Are Not Allowed to Leave Earth”